Gwyneth Paltrow May Have Made A Mistake..
Well, listen up, Taylor Swift. Scooter Braun says he does not understand why you are so upset because he barely knows you. “I think I have met her in my life three times. I will never truly understand that situation.”
Why does she hate Scooter Braun? Why does Justin Bieber hate him? Why does Demi Lovato hate him? So what? A lot of people turned on him. So what? A lot of people turn on Obama, but that does not mean he is a bad guy. Why are you dragging Obama into this? We love Obama.
The Great American State Fair being put on by President Trump’s nonprofit. The acts are dropping like flies, and now we lost Bret Michaels. Bret said, “I was led to believe it was nonpartisan.” It is certainly not. Freedom 250 did not present this as President Trump’s concert. And then it comes out, “Oh, this is Trump’s thing.” And they are like, “This is not what I was told.” It is funny that Milli Vanilli was part of this concert, and Milli Vanilli was deceived. Deceived everybody.
Megan Thee Stallion is showing her revenge body after she and Klay Thompson broke up. You know who does not care about Klay Thompson? Klay Thompson.
You do not think so? Once you have done it, you have done it. Here is what we are going to do. We are going to change the term from revenge body to bitter body.
We got Earl Thompson, a star on Bravo’s Love Hotel. Do you see yourself doing reality TV again for love? There are so many of these shows, but they are all so good. You know the show they have not done that they should do? Get people who are not good-looking at all. Harvey, you call it the bridge troll. You make it exciting. You call it Bumping Uglies.
“I do not know Taylor Swift.” Oh, then what is all the fighting about? Scooter was on the Second Thought podcast with Susie Weiss and the Free Press. There was a whole controversy that he owned the rights to her first six studio albums. Because his company bought her former label. Taylor condemned the sale, saying she was never given a fair chance to buy the masters herself, and said Scooter never gave her a fair chance either.
“You become the boogeyman overnight on TikTok. It went from being loved and appreciated for over a decade to literally the next night you are the villain.”
“I do not know Taylor Swift. I think I have met her in my life three times. I once got invited to a private party by her. She told me she had the utmost respect for me. That must have been a while back.”
The real question is not whether you know her. The issue is did Scooter Braun deny her the right to get her masters back? Her dad was offered this catalog. That is not true. You could read it. Well argued. Taylor said Scooter did offer to sell her the masters, but only if she signed an NDA in which she could not say negative things about him. She would not sign. Did not like the deal. That is called America, folks.
“He has been accused by this army of withholding it from her unfairly. That is just not true.”
I have a beef with him. He did somebody else’s podcast yesterday, and then I asked him to do our Live today, and he cannot do it today. It is worse than that. He went to his son and asked him to guilt trip his dad. You tried to strongarm a twelve-year-old? I think he is eleven.
Anyway, she eventually got the masters back. He is banging Sydney Sweeney. So, happy ending for everyone, and we can all go home. “I wish her nothing but the best.”
Gwyneth Paltrow, you are a real chef. I see you cooking all the time. Gwyneth Paltrow is freaking people out with her kitchen hack. She was on the Today show with Savannah Guthrie and Carson Daly, and she was cooking turkey meatballs, and she reveals a little fun hack you can do in the kitchen if you do not want dairy. “One trick that I do is I dice up arugula and I put it in.”
Really? That is weird. It sounds weird, but it kind of adds a nice texture to it, and it is delicious. Arugula is good with meatballs. But in place of cheese—is she—I do not know what she is doing. She is in movies still. She is doing whatever she wants. She is really interesting. I had drinks with a woman who was friends with her when they were really young, and she was wild. She admits that she was wild. She went to Spence in New York City. She is running around New York City. Angry at her parents, doing tons of drugs. Bingo. She used to hold—they would take turns holding each other’s hair over the toilet. We do that when we are poor, though. Courtney did that earlier this morning, dude.
And it is delicious.
And now, let us see how Megan Thee Stallion is doing after her breakup with Klay Thompson. Apparently, she is hanging in there just fine. Megan Thee Stallion was showing off her revenge bod at Miami Fashion Week. Yes, Megan hit the runway only a month after she broke up with the NBA star and accused him of cheating. And there are only two words to describe her now: holy smokes.
I always thought she was that hot. Did it change? She has always been super hot. There is an after-breakup glow about the body. It is toned up. She is making quite a statement. Or is she? But you know who does not care about that? Klay Thompson.
He might be regretting leaving this. He might see her and think, “Man, I messed up.” This is what women think. It is such a myth. If it is a myth, how come it is called a revenge body? We are going to change the term from revenge body to bitter body. No. No. Seems like the women are on board. Even if he does not care, what we want is for people to come up to you and consistently tell you you are an idiot. Klay Thompson is probably thinking, “I have already had that, and I am moving on to something else.”
But why? Why would you when you have the whole package in me? You know the old saying, J. No, I do not know the old saying. Jason, do you want me to say it? No, because I do not want to say it. Really makes you think. Congrats, Megan, on somehow looking hotter even though you were already super hot.
A lot of people coming to your aid here with the manspreading. Yeah. Tina Fey sat down with Travis and Jason on the New Heights podcast to talk about her viral moment with Timothée Chalamet at a Knicks game, where Timothée Chalamet was seen hitting a pretty elite manspread courtside. It was aggressive. I will say, you have got to remember, for every amount that he is sitting like this and manspreading, I am doing the opposite. My legs—I got a big—I got a big old can.
How do people get upset about that? How can you not get upset about it? I mean, it is annoying. I am not going to sit there and look at an invisible partition. This is empty space, but if I sat like this, that would be weird. But that was ridiculous. It is not that far. He sat like this. That is too much. But I am saying, show me a natural spread. It is usually like this. Exactly. Why are you asking Branson to spread his legs? He is like, “Branson, spread them.”
We had no beats. It was all good. And the Knicks won, so everybody was happy.
Our country has never been more divided. And now our angering discord may be costing us the greatest concert that ever existed. Thanks a lot, America. The Great American State Fair that is being put on by President Trump’s nonprofit is falling apart at the seams. The acts are dropping like flies, and now we lost Bret Michaels. Also out: Martina McBride, Young MC, Morris Day, the Commodores, and even the half of Milli Vanilli that is still alive. Not sure if he is Millie or Vanilli, but either way, he is out. But why? They are saying they are getting threats because it is a very partisan event, even though they say they were misled about what it was. Some are saying they did not actually realize the concert was Trump-affiliated. It is just, here are some concerts in D.C. for the 250th anniversary of America. Then they all—their management was like, “Okay, fine. We will play this show.” And then it comes out, “Oh, this is Trump’s thing.” And then all these artists are now Trump-associated, and they are like, “This is not what I was told.”
But fear not, because Flo Rida, C+C Music Factory, and Vanilla Ice are still on board. And when we spoke to Vanilla Ice on our Live, he explained why. “There is nothing political about Vanilla Ice, that is for sure. And I will play for any president anywhere. And if they invite me, I am honored. I will go play for Putin, and I will play in Iran if you want. It does not matter. There are fans everywhere. Music is not political, man. It is universal. Just brings people together.”
But are the three remaining acts going to have a lot of time to fill? It is sixteen days. That is a long time. Well, it is like a chick having a birthday. Are you kidding me? That is the lowest-hanging fruit. It is the easiest to reach and saves a lot of time. See you at the concert. Vanilla Ice fence.
“Mindy, what is your message to anyone that is looking at you saying, ‘Damn, Mindy looks fantastic’?” We got Mindy Kaling in New York City. She looks so different. It is shockingly different. She is walking around town like this now, and she looks great. She lost a lot of weight since she had her youngest baby. She said she did it for her kids. Her mom died when she was young. “For anyone who wants to start on that journey, Mindy, what does that look like?” That hard and being consistent is hard. Whatever she is doing, though, it is working. The girl looks ten out of ten. Consistency. Do you think that is true? Consistency. She is right.
What did you have for breakfast today? I had a chicken sandwich. But do you know what I found out? California Chicken Cafe has now deboned all the chicken breast. There has never been a bone in a chicken breast. Yes, there has. There are no bones in the breast. Yes, there are. I know you have not touched a breast in a while. We have no bones.
Coming up, Madonna is revealing the best person she has ever had sex with. John F. Kennedy Jr. “This guy was unbelievable, but he could not pass the bar.” He passed. It took him a very long time. Would you give up passing the bar to have Madonna say you were the best she ever had? Take out Madonna. Just say anybody.
Plus, we got Elkan out. He has worked with Drake. So we asked, “Does that mean you have to stop listening to Kendrick?” Won’t time heal all wounds, and then they can get together, hold hands, do a duet album? “He is no longer a certified pedophile. Like, it will just—like sort of like—” He got decertified.
Hi, Barry was on the Today show, and Jenna Bush Hager asked, “Biggest ick.” Hoda misheard her. Oh no. I thought she was like—what? Hoda misheard her. She thought she said biggest penis. Did she give a name? She said her boyfriend. That is hysterical. Did she ultimately give an ick? No, the whole interview got derailed.
The insanity of women can never be as well assessed as when you ask them what their biggest icks are, because it is all over the map, and it is things that you think are totally innocuous. It is so ridiculous. I feel like when somebody says an ick that you have not thought of, you think about it, and you are like, “Yeah, I agree with that.” All right, give us one. I do not like it when guys reverse into a parking spot. That is such a dealbreaker. There is nothing cooler than a guy that can back the boat in. You are just a collection of icks stuck together as gum. It sounded like that, did not it?
Coming up, we got Earl Thompson. He was the main star on Bravo’s Love Hotel. He got paired up with Shannon Beador. They broke up. So our camera guy talked to him and asked, “Is there anyone in the Bravo universe that you would shoot your shot at?”
“Kyle Richards.” Kyle Richards. Yeah, she is adorable. “Phaedra Parks. She has got it going on. She is a fashionista.” But he says he is down to do another love reality show. Probably the number one would be The Golden Bachelor. “I think I am ready for that now. And to meet people that are really looking to find someone to be their future rocking chair partner.”
You know the show they have not done that they should do? Just get people who are, you know, brute. Just not good-looking at all. And you put them all together. Harvey, you call it the bridge troll. He called it the prince. You make it exciting. You call it Bumping Uglies. “I could see myself doing it and really finally finding the love of my life.”
Coming up, we got Chad Smith, Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer, and we asked him about doing the doppelganger monologue with Will Ferrell on SNL. They could be twins. Really close. “Has that SNL appearance cleared up any fans coming up to you thinking you are Will?” “He has only made it worse.”
“Do you guys actually hang out?” “You know, we are friendly. Yeah, we go to sporting events, and I love him. He is the best.” They are very close. They could be twins. Really close. You know, I get confused with a lot. When I was young, Steve Guttenberg. No, of a lot. We were together with a bunch of people in Vegas, and somebody confused you with somebody else. They yelled Steve Harvey. Remember that? They called you Steve Harvey. Yeah. Especially now with the teeth. Not a bad guy to be mistaken for.
